Many who are single in their fifties may have adult children from their first marriage. Whether the marriage broke due to death or divorce, single parents may hesitate on moving forward and finding someone for themselves. But once they muster up the courage to go out and date, they have an even bigger issue to deal with. Finding love again is a beautiful thing, and everyone deserves a second chance to live their life and be happy. So, when older couples want wedding ceremonies to take place so that they can say ‘I do,’ in front of a wedding officiant once again, their children may not want them to do so. Here is how to handle your child’s disapproval when getting remarried.
Why They May Show Disapproval
Many psychologists have researched, why children may act out when told that their parent wants to remarry. Even though most of these children are, in fact, adults by this time, they still find it incredibly hard to process the fact that their parent is remarrying. Dr. Carole D. Lieberman, a psychiatrist in Beverly Hills states that: “Children of all ages feel betrayed and abandoned when their parents’ divorce because their cozy nest is disrupted. This even upsets kids who are already out of the nest. The message their parents are sending is that it is more important for them to have a life of their choosing than to remain in their prior, primary role of mom or dad.”
They may feel jealous that someone is intruding in their comfortable life. One of the biggest but most silent reasons for the veto is that they fear their parents will not provide for them anymore or will provide for them less. They also fear that the parent will not include them in their will, and the property and other assets will go to their significant other instead.
Tips on How to Get Remarried Without Tension in the Family
There are many ways that single parents wanting to get married can swiftly steer through the murky waters of having to tell their children their wants. Here are a few tips:
Only let them know details once you are serious with your partner
If you have been dating openly, do not let them know of every single partner, as they may not take you seriously when you tell them you’ve found the right one. Once you have established a serious relationship and are heading towards marriage, tell your children way in advance so that they can get used to the idea. If you plan on eloping, definitely tell your children as they may feel betrayed and feel like they were not important enough to be told about this plan.
Spending quality time with them
No matter their age, take out time and plan activities to do with your children so that they do not feel left out or forgotten. You can include your children in meetings with the wedding officiant from Oklahoma before the wedding, as they will feel wanted and important then. Maybe even get them excited about the wedding, and let them plan activities and the wedding essentials etc. You can ask help from the wedding officiant from OKC on how to deal with your child’s disapproval, and how to make them feel wanted and remembered even during the intimate wedding ceremony.
Stand up for yourself
Even though it can be helpful to negotiate with your children, it is important to let them know that you also are a human being who deserves to be happy. If they are really upset, you can ask an experienced wedding officiant from Oklahoma City to sit with them and make them understand the same concept in a more objective way.
The Money Talk
If you feel like your children are more upset about the financial loss aspect of the wedding, then you can have a talk with them, or maybe even sit down with your children and a lawyer to mutually agree and understand the financial distribution and how you are structuring your will.