Your partner has finally popped the question, and you could not be more excited! The planning for your wedding is in full swing, and you are preparing to choose your wedding party. You have like a gazillion best friends; so which ones do you choose as your bridesmaids? Dr. John Patrick Keefe, a wedding officiant in Oklahoma City, is here to help you answer that question!
Are you close to her?
Do you and your friend make an effort regularly contact one another? Seriously, if the two of you barely see one another, should you be asking her to stand up in your wedding? A good rule of thumb is never to pick a woman to be your bridesmaid just to fill a space simply. Granted, if the two of you live a far distance from one another, you might not get to see each other as much as you would like, but you have a phone, texting, and the internet.
Have you seen each other in the past 12 months?
If your gal pal is truly worthy of being in your wedding, you will probably be able to answer this question with a “yes.” Again, if distance separates you, that is an understandable reason not to have seen each other in a long while. However, make sure your friend is willing and able to travel to your wedding.
Does she make you happy?
Think about the times you and your friend have hung out together. Where these times stressful? Does she have your best interests at heart? The women you choose as your bridesmaids should make you feel joyful, happy, and relaxed.
Did she ask you to stand up in her wedding?
Look, just because she asked you to be a bridesmaid in her wedding does not mean you are obligated to ask her to stand up in yours. Don’t base your decision on whom to ask to be a bridesmaid in your wedding because you feel that you have to. If you do not want her in your wedding party, that is OK.
Is she kin?
It does not matter if she is your cousin, sister, niece, aunt, or next door neighbor who used to give you cookies, if you do not want her in your wedding, that is perfectly fine. However, family members should supersede non-family members when making your bridesmaid list. John Keefe, an OKC wedding minister, says that this will help avoid any hurt feelings.
Does she support your marriage?
This is a no-brainer. You do not want a woman standing up in your wedding if she hates your fiancée or has any other objections to your marriage. It is imperative that your bridal party is fully supportive of your future marriage. John Patrick Keefe II says that your wedding will not truly be all that can be if you have a bridal party full of sneering hens who are judging your life choices.